www.helpyourteens.com
www.witsendbook.com
www.suescheff.com
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Communication: Keeping the lines of communication of your child should
be a priority with all parents. It is important to let your kids know you
are
always there for them no matter what the subject is. If there is a subject
you are not comfortable with, please be sure your child has someone they
can open up to. I believe that when kids keep things bottled up, it can
be when negative behaviors can start to grow.
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Knowing your Children's Friends: This is critical, in my opinion.
Who are your kids hanging out with? Doing their homework with? If they
are spending a lot of time at a friends house, go out of your way to call
the parent
introduce yourself. Especially if they are spending the night at a friends
house, it important to take time to call the parents or meet them. This
can give you a feeling of security knowing where your child is and who they
are
with.
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Know your Child's Teachers - Keep track of their attendance
at school: Take time to meet each teacher and be sure they have your contact
information and you have theirs if there are any concerns regarding your
child. In the same respect, take time to meet your child's Guidance
Counselor.
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Keep your Child Involved: Whether it is sports, music, drama, dance,
and school clubs such as chess, government, school newspaper or different
committees
such as prom, dances and other school activities. Keeping your child busy
can keep them out of trouble. If you can find your child's passion - whether
it is football, soccer, gymnastics, dance, music - that can help keep
them focused and hopefully keep them on track in school.
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Learn about Internet Social Networking: In today's Cyber generation
this has to be a priority. Parents need to help educate their kids on Cyber
Safety - think before they post, help them to understand what they
put up today, may haunt them tomorrow. Don't get involved with strangers
and especially don't talk about sex with strangers. Avoid meeting in
person the people you meet online without you being there. On the same note
- cell
phone and texting - don't allow your child to freely give out
their cell numbers and never post them online. Parents should consider ReputationDefender/MyChild
www.reputationdefender.com/mychild to further help protect their children
online.
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Encourage your teen to get a job or volunteer: In today's generation
I think we need to instill responsibility and accountability. This can
start early by encouraging your teen to either get a job or volunteer, especially
during the summer. Again, it is about keeping them busy, however at the
same
time teaching them responsibility. I always tell parents to try to encourage
their teens to get jobs at Summer Camps, Nursing Homes, ASPCA, Humane Society
or places where they are giving to others or helping animals. It can truly
build self esteem to help others.
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Make Time for your Child: This sounds very simple and almost obvious,
but with today's busy schedule of usually both parents working full
time or single parent households, it is important to put time aside weekly
(if
not daily at dinner) for one on one time or family time. Today life is
all about electronics (cell phones, Ipods, Blackberry's, computers,
etc) that the personal touch of actually being together has diminished.
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When Safety trumps privacy: If you suspect your teen is using drugs,
or other suspicious behaviors (lying, defiance, disrespectful, etc) it is
time
to start asking questions - and even “snooping” - I
know there are two sides to this coin, and that is why I specifically mentioned “if
you suspect” things are not right - in these cases - safety
for your child takes precedence over invading their privacy. Remember - we
are the parent and we are accountable and responsible for our child.
-
Are you considering outside treatment for your child?
Residential Therapy
is a huge step, and not a step that is taken lightly. Do your homework!
When your child's behavior escalates to a level of belligerence,
defiance, substance abuse or God forbid gang relations - it may be
time to seek outside help. Don't be ashamed of this - put your
child's
future first and take steps to get the help he/she needs - immediately,
but take your time to find the right placement. Read Wit's End!
www.witsendbook.com
for more information.
-
Be a parent FIRST: There are parents that want to be their child's
friend and that is great - but remember you are a parent first. Set
boundaries - believe
it not kids want limits (and most importantly - need them). Never threaten
consequences you don't plan on following through with.
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