Parenting teens is not for the faint of heart, and it is one reason why teens need curfews put in place. A curfew with real follow-through is one of the simplest ways to keep teens out of trouble.
Curfews are an important part of raising teenagers. They help make sure your teen is safe while also teaching them responsibility, self-control, and time management skills.
A curfew establishes the time you expect your teen to be back home in the evening, whether it is from a party or shopping at the mall, it is a way to keep your teen safe as well as demonstrate respect for the family.
Setting a clear curfew time also keeps teens away from the late-night situations that most often bring young people into contact with the criminal justice system.
Why Are Curfews Important For Teens:
1. Safety. Teen curfews ensure that teenagers are in the safety of their homes. Although your teen may be a responsible person, it could be the behavior of other people that can be the concern.
Driving home late at night has higher risks of drunk drivers on the road. A curfew is also a way for a teen to gracefully get out of an unsafe or unpleasant situation.
2. Teaches teen responsibility.  A curfew helps your teen learn to be responsible about their time and the places they visit and prepares them to shoulder more responsibility as they grow. Following rules is an important part of the process into adulthood. Creating a safe environment to do this learning is a tough job.
3. Provides structure. Teen curfews provide teens with structure and reinforce positive habits in their lives. Most teenagers have plenty of commitments, including school and activities, such as sports and hobbies. Teens tend to be impulsive and can make hasty decisions that can send them in the wrong direction.
4.Teaches time management. Learning to manage their time is a big part of growing up. If you set their curfew to be home by 11 pm, they need to manage their time so that they leave from the venue in time to reach home. There will be times that you may have to make exceptions, that should be planned. Whether it is a working event or a concert, there might be times the curfew will be modified for that one evening. A reasonable curfew for 16 year olds, for example, is often a little later than for younger teens, so adjust the time to match your teen’s age and maturity.
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5. Peace of mind. When parents and family are at ease, the home life is more content. A teen curfew not only protects your teens, but also offers the parents or guardians immense peace of mind. When your teenager is home at an appropriate time each evening, it helps you relax.
Experts agree, teens need curfews, but how can you set them and make them stick?
Tips to Set Teen Curfews:
1. Talk to your teen. Choose a reasonable curfew together. Before setting the curfew, you may want to consider:
- Is it a weekend?
- Is it a school night?
- What is the event?
- Who is attending?
- Who is driving?
- The time of the event?
2. Your state/city law. It is important to know and understand your community’s law. Does your town, city, or state have any laws that might affect your teen’s curfew? In some parts of the country, there are juvenile curfew laws that prohibit children below a certain age from spending time in public after certain hours.
3. Importance of sleep. Getting enough sleep is important for their mental and physical health, as well as their ability to excel in school and other activities. Setting a curfew helps them to get to bed at a reasonable hour. It should also include shutting down of their devices.
4. Communicate your expectations. Before your teen leaves the house, be sure they clearly understand the curfew you have set in place. They should know their curfew, what they need to do if they are running late, and the consequences they will face if they break their curfew.
5. Set consequences. If your teen breaks a curfew, it is important you set and follow through with the consequences you have outlined. There will also be times when your teen may break curfew for reasons beyond their control. For example, poor weather conditions might make it dangerous for them to drive. Or maybe their designated driver has gotten drunk, and they need to call a cab. These are times to be flexible.
Should teens have a curfew? The pros and cons
Pros:
- Parents know when to expect their teen home and when to start worrying.
- It limits time in the late-night situations where drinking, drugs and risky driving are most common.
- It protects sleep, which most teens are already short on during the school week.
- It gives teens an easy excuse to leave a party (“my parents will kill me”).
Cons:
- A curfew that is too strict, or never adjusted as a teen gets older, invites lying and sneaking out.
- It does nothing on its own about where your teen is or who they are with before curfew.
- Constant fights over a few minutes can damage the relationship more than the late arrival itself.
Most families find the pros win out when the curfew is negotiated, explained and loosened as trust is earned.
What time should a teen curfew be?
There is no single right answer, and it should depend on your teen’s maturity, school schedule and where you live. Many families start with something like this and adjust:
- Ages 13-14: around 8-9 p.m. on school nights, 9-10 p.m. on weekends.
- Ages 15-16: around 9-10 p.m. on school nights, 10-11 p.m. on weekends.
- Ages 17-18: around 10 p.m. on school nights, 11 p.m.-midnight on weekends.
If your teen drives, check your state’s graduated driver licensing rules, which often restrict night driving for new drivers. A CDC study of drivers aged 16-17 found that 57% of their fatal night crashes happened before midnight, so an earlier curfew for new drivers is worth considering even where the law allows later.
Do curfews keep teens out of trouble?
A family curfew and a city curfew law are different things. City-wide juvenile curfew laws have a poor track record: a Campbell Collaboration review of 12 evaluations concluded they are ineffective at reducing crime and victimization. What helps at home is not the rule by itself but the supervision that comes with it: knowing where your teen is, who they are with, and having a clear, consistent consequence when the curfew is broken.
If curfew battles are part of a bigger pattern of defiance, running away or substance use, it may be time to look at therapeutic boarding schools, which pair school with daily therapy and structure.
Conclusion:
Curfews are about safety, self control, time management and feeling fresh for the next day. Set clear expectations and consequences and stick to them, but be flexible if s/he demonstrates responsibility.
Do you have a teenager that is constantly breaking curfew, sneaking out, running away? Have they stopped going to school or doing drugs? Since 2020 teen depression and anxiety has doubled. Teenage mental health is a crisis today, contact us for a free consultation if you have exhausted your local resources and searching for schools for troubled teens.
Also read:
Why Therapeutic Schools Are Successful
3 Reasons for Therapeutic Boarding Schools
What Is the Cost of Therapeutic Boarding Schools
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