Is your teen refusing to talk to a therapist? This has become a common problem and concern for parents of troubled teens.
Although some may teens enjoy going to therapy and opening up about their struggles, most are reluctant to attend and it’s an uphill battle for parents to get them to a session.
When you suspect your teen has a mental health problem, behavior disorder, or using substances, it’s important to seek treatment. There are several options you can do to get your teen the treatment they need.
How to Bring Up the Subject With Your Teen
If you think your teen might need counseling, the way you bring up the subject is very important. The first conversation you have will likely set the tone for your teen’s attitude about therapy.
It’s common for teens to be embarrassed by their problems and it can be hard for them to admit they need help. So it’s important to avoid sending a message that could cause feelings of shame.
Don’t imply your teen is crazy or that they’re not smart enough to make good choices. Instead, share why you think counseling is important and how it could be helpful. Ask for input from your teen and be willing to listen to your teen’s opinions.
If you experience with therapy yourself, considering sharing that with your teen, which can normalize it and remove some of the stigma.
Should You Force Your Teen to Get Treatment?
A teen who feels forced to get treatment isn’t likely to be motivated to change. So even if they get dragged to their appointments, they aren’t likely to talk about their issues—at least not in a productive manner.
That’s not to say you shouldn’t make it mandatory that your teen attend at least a few appointments.
Sometimes, a skilled therapist can help a teen feel more comfortable after a few sessions. And sometimes, a teen who tells you they hate therapy or that they don’t need help might be talking openly to a therapist.
Your teen might just not want you to know that they actually like therapy.
Of course, there may be times when your teen needs help regardless of whether they agree. If they’re at risk of hurting themselves or someone else, call 911 or take them to the emergency room. If they’re engaging in risky behavior, treatment should be mandatory.
If your teen refuses to go to counseling, there are still options:
- Seek counseling on your own without your teen. Often, parent-training can be one of the most effective ways to help teens. A therapist may be able to teach you how to coach your teen. If your teen knows you’re going to counseling to talk about them, they might also be interested in going to share “their side” of the story.
- Speak with your teen’s school guidance counselor. Discuss whether there are any services available within the school system to help your child. A teen who won’t meet with a counselor outside of school may be willing to speak with a guidance counselor.
- Create a contract with your teen. If it’s a mild issue that you’re concerned about, create a contract with your teen. Tell your teen that they have to go to a certain number of sessions before they can make a decision about whether to continue treatment.
- Consider online counseling. Sometimes, teens who won’t speak to someone face-to-face will consider talking to a therapist online. Online treatment isn’t appropriate for every condition so it’s important to talk to a therapist or your teen’s physician about the potential pros and cons before you begin treatment.
Also read:
5 Benefits of Therapeutic Boarding Schools for Troubled Teens
How Music Therapy Can Help Your Troubled Teen
###
If you are struggling with your troubled teenager and you have exhausted your local resources (including trying talk-therapy), learn more about how residential treatment can help your teen. Contact us today for a free consultation.
Contributor Amy Morin, author of 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do.